Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Tough Decisions

Today I made a really tough decision. Which also means I've spent a good chunk of the day crying. And now my eyes hurt.... 

For probably the last month or so I've been debating back and forth on whether or not I should find a new home for Lola. On the one hand, she really is a great dog. (If you have been following me on Instagram lately you may have a different opinion, but really overall she's great.) She's totally potty-trained - it's been months since she had any accidents in the house. She comes when called, is kenneled trained, knows some tricks, is great with kids, loves other people and other dogs, and is so full of love it can get overwhelming at times. She loves laying on the tramp and sitting in the front seat of the car with her head out the window. She loves staring out the front window, even if there's nothing going on outside. And more than anything she loves to cuddle and give kisses. 

With all that being said, we've had our fair share of struggles. As my Instagram followers know, in the past week she has chewed up my couch and my porch swing. Prior to that, she brought about the destruction of my trampoline pad, backyard drip-lines, sprinklers, porch swing pillows, ping-pong balls, door frames, and the overall appearance of my backyard. Is that reason alone to find her a new home? No. Is it extremely annoying? Absolutely. Does it completely piss me off? You betcha. But again, she is a 9th month old puppy. And puppies chew and puppies destroy things. I knew that going into this situation. 

What I didn't anticipate is how little free time I have at home. 

All day during the week I'm at work. Which means she's sitting in her kennel. After work I come home and play with her for a bit, but let's say I go to dinner. There goes another two hours of my night. Oh, I need to run by a store.... It's someone's birthday and I need to get a present tonight... I want to go to a movie... That all adds up to more time Lola spends alone in her kennel. And the remaining hours I am home, I'm sleeping. 

So now we come to the weekend. 

If you know me, you know I live for either Saturday pool days or weekend vacations. Again, both of these are more time away from my house and more time away from Lola. 

She deserves more. 

She deserves a family who can be home with her during the day. Who has the time to teach her now, during the puppy stage, to be good and not eat the furniture. She needs a family who can help wear out more of her puppy energy. She needs more people around to love. 

Last weekend I had 5 of my nieces and nephews over to my house. Lola loved every minute of it. She was bouncing around from kid to kid with such excitement. And she was even gentle when Savvi pulled on her face and ears. That's what she needs. A family. People she can grow up with and love and protect. 

Will I one day have a family like the one I hope for for Lola. I hope so. But I don't now. And I don't know when that time will come. 

So, it was with a lot of sadness, but confidence that I have made the right decision, that I wrote to the animal rescue I got Lola from today and expressed my feelings about needing to find her a new and better home. I worried I would regret my decision when I got home and saw her face. And while it wasn't easy looking at my cute little puppy knowing she wouldn't be my cute little puppy for much longer I continued to feel peace about my decision - despite the 30 minutes of sobbing. 

So until I hear back from the rescue (who's policy is that you contact them if you plan to find a new home for your pet) I've decided to spend my remaining time with Lola having fun and not being angry about the couch or swing. As I sit here at the dog park writing this post I look forward to snuggling my pup later tonight and as much as I can until she finds her new home.