Two Decisions

I’m the kind of person who once I have a thought swirling around in my head I cannot move on until I’ve come to a decision. It’s all I can think about until there is some sort of resolution. I think it’s a good and super annoying trait of mine. A trait that has been in full swing here of late.

It’s no secret that for the past little bit I have been questioning whether I should go back to school and get a Ph.D. I’ve thought about it A LOT over the past week or so. I reached out to a friend who is just finishing up her Ph.D. and asked her a million questions about it. I looked up a bunch of different schools and found an Accounting Ph.D. program at the University of Texas – Austin and learned that applications are due Dec. 15^th to be considered for entrance the following fall semester. I looked up details on the GMAT. And I prayed about it.

So yeah, I’ve been thinking about it just a bit. J

And for the majority of the day yesterday I felt like I had made a decision on what to do. I decided I would just apply to the UT-Austin program and see what happens. If I get in – great, I’ll get a Ph.D. If I don’t – oh well, I’ll keep doing what I’m doing. The application fees weren’t that much and the GMAT has to be easier than the CPA exam. So I really wasn’t going to lose much either way. And for most of the day that was where my thoughts “felt” settled.

It wasn’t until the last 5 minutes of my drive home from work last night that I came to my second and final decision. To be fair, this new resolution came to me during those final minutes of my drive home but weren’t cemented until I received the answers I got as part of my Day 3 scripture reading challenge (see earlier post). And that conclusion was this – trust God. Trust in the plan He has for my life. Trust in where He’s led me so far. Stop trying to change everything all the time. Take a minute and appreciate the life I’ve been given and have been able to create.

I have been very blessed in a number of ways. And when I sit back and think about it I realize that I’m in a really great position in my life. There is no need to make drastic changes. There are plenty of smaller projects I can work on to better myself and find more joy and happiness in my life.

So that’s where I am now. Although the thought of getting a Ph.D. is intense and kind of exciting, it is not the path I see for myself at this time. And that’s ok.

Let me end with one of the answers I received last night from my scripture reading. It’s from Jeremiah 17:7.

“Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and whose hope the Lord is.”